Hieronymus is Stressed the F Out!

Listen: shit is getting real over here in Hieronymus Town! Ok, I'm sorry, I don't want to take this out on you, come back, I'll chill out.

Sorry for that outburst. No need for profanity on the old blog piece, but I'm trying to keep it real out there for the streets! I am 25 now, and with that new grown up number seems to be a miriade of grown up responsibilities that are manifesting into some physical problems. I wish someone would have told me that being "grown and sexy" wasn't all eating as much candy as you want and bieng able to jump on the bed in my free time. Thanks for the heads up mom! NOT! I guess the stress about money for the down payment and my new real estate search has manifested in grinding my teeth in my sleep, as well as neck spasms! OMG its so terrible! if someone had warned me that this was how 25 was going to be rolling, I would have skipped right over to 26!

At any rate, I have had to start sleeping w/ a mouth gaurd to avoid breaking my teeth (WTF SRSYL...that is messed up).

Srsly? A mouth guard?! I'm not playing pewee league hockey over here, I'm just trying to catch some winks! Since when did I need protective wear to relax and catch some ZZZs? This is no bueno.



Another casualty due to this stress has been my neck. It had been feeling more and more jacked up over the past few days, leading to way more icey hot/hot water bottle use/and muscle relaxers than I would care to have incorporated into my active lifestyle! Then this weekend after my neck got continually more stiff, I woke up on Monday morning, and I just couldn't do it. I had to call into work b/c I srsly couldn't comfortably move my head. I spent the day w/ a hot water bottle that Rodger went and bought me and I passed out til the early afternoon. Just in time to realize that it was 4/20. The worst day to call in sick ever! Now everyone is going to think I was over at my house smoking doobie joints on my sick day! I never call in sick, and the one day I do, its the national stoner holiday/white supremacists celebration of Hilter's bday. Not a good look. Aint that always the way? (hah spell check is confused by my use of the word "aint")


Bong Boy - video powered by Metacafe
(this is what comes up when you google "bong boy")

Well with all of this new stress, I have started doing positive visualization style meditations, trying to eat better, and a little stress shopping. Case in point: check out my new adidas that I bought myself to make myself feel joy again. (JK I often feel joy, im just being dramatic).

But wearing these does legitamatly make me feel joyous, so thats a start. Plus I think Rodger and I are going to start doing some hip hop abs bootleg dvd he has laying around somewhere. So until this passes, I shall use the Secret/meditate/and wear my cute new shoes. This too shall pass!

Housing Search 09

M.A.S.H.

So what will it be? Will I live in a mansion, apartment, shack or house? Well I would like to cast my vote for mansion, but I'm afraid that i will land in the oft forgotten last option CBB (card board box). That's real talk!

Well maybe not CBB but srsly this task is getting daunting! There was this one house that I liked over in Bed Stuy, that was listed at 349k, it had a bunch of garbage in the font and back yards and a broken sky light, and some broken windows but needed minimal repairs. It was a distress sale with a bunch of leans on the house, and the man selling the house did leave immediately after the Sunday showing to go buy a tall boy of beer, but I was still feeling optimistic!

(how fitting, when I'm living on the streets b/c I can't find a house I will be right there brown bagging it along side this shadster.) No matter how many shady people I met in this life, morning beer is always unsettling to me.

Probably against my better judgment I called the real estate broker who was handling the sale of that house a few weeks later to see if this house was still on the market. He told me that there was a "slight change" to the property. He tole me that unbeknownst to the drunk gentleman that showed us the home. One of his partners had taken out a secret second morgage on the house, and that they owed 50k more to the bank than they had realized. SECRET MORGAGE?! Now don't get me wrong, I believe in The Secret, it has basically been responsable for every lucky aspect of my life, I also really like secrets in gereal, keeping them, telling them, etc. However I DO NOT condone SECRET MORGAGES! Thats just crazy town! And its totally indicative to what has caused our country to be in this economic pickle! Giving shady day drunk dudes free money and pulling equity out of homes that haven't been paid off at at, and are sitting empty over in the hood. So he told me that due to this revelation, they had to raise the price 50k over night to cover this secret mortgage.

Don't get me wrong, the house was a deal at 349k, b/c I was planning on using my schrewd bargaining skills to get him down to 320k. Now 320 would have been a steal. But at 400k, that house was FAR from a steal. NEways, the real estate dude was telling me all this at like 10am on a Monday morning over the telephone. He then told me about some fictional buyers who, before they had raised the price had make an offer for 390k but lost their financing. Which I guess was supposed to make me feel like some other suckers were willing to pay that amount so I should fall in line and pay that much. But who in their right minds would place an offer on a house that is 50k more than the asking price after its been sitting littered w/ trash for over a year on the market? I hate it when not sneaky people try to be sneaky. It ends up just being kind of pathetic. So I tried to politely ease my way off of the phone w/o calling anyone out on their failed shiestyness. I mean I don't get my jollies by trying to make shiesty real estate dudes feel bad about themselves, I just wanted nothing to do with this shady deal. So I told him "I would call Him." You know like, over the phone break up style, but he didn't take the hint and he was like, "Great! can you call me as soon as Wednesday to get a deal started?!" and then I had to keep it real w/ him and say, "Yea....um ...actually probably not. " Its not you its me! But he seemed to get the hint, and he let me off the phone w/ o too much further squirming. Some one needed to show that guy that "He's just not into you!" movie! But I digress, I will probably wait until it gets turned over to the bank and buy it for like a dollar. B/c ice water flows through my veins and I am a schrewd buissness woman of the 90s!


Maybe if I buy it off the bank for a dollar, they will give it to the day drunk guy so he can buy a frosty brew.
Remind me to wear my power suit more.


Anyway, that was a minor set back, and upon looking at other homes, I have seen other houses, with way more space in them so let the search continue! And I do plan on actively using "The Secret" and a "Hobo's pocket full of hope" to find me my dream home.

Hieronymus turns 25!

Well my birthday was last week. I turned the big 25. I kind of wanted to just hide out and like go to a dive bar. Maybe drink some secret Coors Lights. To be honest I wasn't feeling too psyched on turning 25. I previously had thought that 25 was at least the year that I could rent a car and thus be a legit grown folk. but the someone told me that I could already rent a Zip car. So there went the one perk to the big 25. So I was feeling like 25 could b ea good opportunity to lay low and eat it off. But Rodger would have nothing of it! So we decided to have a little taco party/house old school birthday party! Plus there is a recession on (you maybe haven't heard about it, there hasn't been that much media attention about it). PSYCH! Everyone knows that we all broke now! SRSLY we decided to have a good old fashioned birthday party at the crib. So we decided to have a taco party and invite the usual suspects. Here is a blog post recounting it, so you can relive the magic! Won't you join me?



Rodger did most of the preperations/planning while I took a more hands off strategy. I made an old timey invite where I photoshopped a monical and a top hat atop my head. Wait. Photo shop isn't really old timey at all. New Timey? Never mind. I had to make an extra classy invite to match the extra classy party that was going to go down! So I basically photoshopped myself to look like an Anna version of Mr. Peanut. Which I think is the best version of Anna, if I had to choose.

Well Rodger was running around all day Friday trying to get the party ready so by the time the party actually went down he was all dazed and discombobulated. I spoke to him at a few different points during the day, and recognized the tell tale panic in his voice. Luckily he pulled out an awesome party with out getting too many gray hairs. Big ups to Rodger! Bup Bup Bup!

Its all a blur!
Poor Rodger! Luckily there was LOTS of sugar at the party to keep him fueled through the night!

ALOT OF SUGAR!!


But all the sugar in the world couldn['t turn this soup puss' frown upside down.

jk. we just caugh him in the mist of a personal moment!

The Food was great! We had tacos, vegan chorizo, ground turkey, chips and guac/salsa, lots of taco fixins, Maragitas (Hanna and Soraya held it down on the drink making situation).



Before:

After:

Plus we had lots of really good sangria b/c Rodger googled "best sangria recipe". Then all night everyone was like, "Dang, that is the best Sangria". Google wins again!


HMM....where could all of that food gone.....
Suspicious! Truch! (That can be Trudy and Zach's Brangelina couple name :)

So everyone feasted, and spirits were high.




And there was lots of adult classy conversating!


Mature socializing!


Not sure how sticking a party favor up your nose necessarily fits into the theme of having a classy grown up party but sure.



Then it was time for the party games! I picked out this ambiguously ethnic Pinata filled w/ delights for everyone to enjoy.



We used one of Danny's crutches and I got a broom stick to do some damage!

Damage to joan's balls! jk! but srsly, I accidentlly almost hit Joan in the balls! Joan really put a lot on the line by offering to be the pinata holder! ALOT! lol. Here is some videos of the pinata bash!








Then we cleaned up the BOOTY!




I thought that peeps would dive face first into the candy piles like second grade stlye, but I had to get the crowd hyped by doing a little of the gathering action for everyone.
haha Hanna looks displeased by my hoarding technique. Don't judge me girl! This sangria is making me tipsy! lol.

After the Pinata and all of the mature partying, no self respecting party would be complete w/o a fudgy the whale cake complete w/ trick candels that don't blow out! Now thats class! No seriously, I love me some ice cream cake. I was in heaven!

Fudgy! You are my only friend! JK, but we go way back, to two years ago when I first tastes the delights of my dear friend Fudgy. Next year Cookie Puss!

I managed to huff and puff all those crazy candles out. And then some trickster switched the 2 and 5 candle to say 52! Those jokesters!



Jokesters!

So after all of the fun and gmaes, we had to pack it in w/ a cray cray sugar coma! Thanks to all the doodz for coming out! Stay tuned for an upcoming blog post on my upcoming trip to chicago! cha cha check it!